This is actually going to be a series of posts over time. I am just posting it here because I think the blog helps me put down thoughts that no word document ever will. When I start typing in the frenzy that I’m typing right now, I cannot explain how words rush to my brain and how sentences form. They just do. So, here is something I’m on. This series is now officially called, Understanding Myself. I will write about little steps that I’m taking, to fully understand myself, which would later govern my career choice, choice of phone, lifestyle and related elements that might sound as crazy as the first three.
So, today I dug myself up and found some traits that fit on my personality and kind of overall make the puzzle called me.
I know that after this post, stalking me will be much easier but I don’t think any serial killer will come after me. 😛
Trait 1 – Impulsive
Yes, I am impulsive. Being impulsive has always put me in trouble and helped very less. Though some wonders like the one that’s in front of your eyes are due to me being impulsive (and angry) still, I think I’ve been in a lot of trouble because of this trait. This is one of the prime reasons this post is coming so late. I deleted all of it in the evening on an impulse that I should write on an issue had to start from scratch.
Trait 2 – Creature of Habit
I know a serial killer grinned after reading this. You can now easily stalk me and kill me, perhaps. I am more or less, a creäture of habit. Primarily because I don’t have much of a social life but it is also influenced by many factors too. I have so far kept the habit of a writing post on Sunday and maintained it. I do the same things each day (with few variations). I don’t change the kind of deodorant or toothpaste I use. Nor do I change my favourite restaurants. I just can’t change things with my life. Once its routine, its done.
Trait 3 – Control Freak
It wasn’t until recently I learned that I am much of a control freak. I lose control and I lose the smile. That is why when someone forces as much as a little favour on me hence I lose control of a situation, I am agonized. This is actually a little something that happened a few days ago. Someone I know (A), knows a certain someone (B) who wants a pen drive from a certain someone (C) and A tells me that B wants his drive from C and C knows me (though I don’t know him) so I would have to take the object from him. This seems a pretty simple (and lame) favour but it made me angry and kind of mad. I went all berserk on A and later regretted and realized that it was my Control Freak nature which was wrong.
Trait 4 – Upfront
I’m aware of this one since a long time. But, Upfront seems a little odd lets say I’m blatantly honest. If your poetry is bad, I’ll tell you its bad. If you’re wrong, I’ll tell you you’re wrong. That is how my brain functions. I fail to understand the concept of low-level politics in between the social structure and obligations though I know why it applies and how important it is, I just don’t get it. That is why I suck as a friend for many because well, who wants another honest opinion in their life.
Trait 5 – Pessimist
Did you notice that no traits above are positive. That brings me to the last part. I’m one of those the glass is half empty people. I can’t help it actually. I never see how bright the sun is, only that it’ll probably rain a few hours later. Even as I do things better, I am always convinced that something will go wrong and it does go wrong. Call it instinct, pessimism or just sheer luck. Whatever is it, I suppose Fortuna isn’t a very big fan of mine.
So, these are the 5 traits I’ve identified within me for the first part of Understanding Myself. Please comment if you feel like it because I seriously want opinions (though I know no one will comment, no one ever does but still… a silver lining maybe.)